Taking Stock of the Market

What with all the financial turmoil dominating the news these days, mes auteurs, I thought an extended financial analogy might be timely. So! The popularity of various genres, authors, and books: sort of like the stock market.

The performance of certain types of books, much like certain types of financial instruments, is cyclical. Vampires were cool in the middle of the last decade (and are still cool to some extent). Is this the first time this has happened? Absolutely not. (I mean, who doesn't remember the vampire riots of the 1720s/1730s?) Is this the last time this has happened? Also absolutely not.

We're probably at the tail end of all this vampire business. This means you can either 1.) focus on writing something else, or 2.) write your vampire novel(s) anyway and hope those angsty blood-chuggers become cool again sometime soon.

Note: a lot of nonfiction titles are dependent on the news cycle. As stories break, people want to learn more about the issues being discussed. Where do they go for that? Well, the Internet. But also books.

Inexperienced participants often make the mistake of buying high and selling low. I've said this before, but if you notice, say, paranormal Amish bromance* is suddenly huge and you want in on the action, you're probably already too late to the party. By the time you get your book written, sold, and published—roughly a year to eighteen months later at the very, very best—there's no guarantee that the genre will still be popular.

On the other hand, some people won't write in a particular genre or category because said genre or category hasn't sold in forever. That's fine, but you should always be aware that today's Huge Trend™ was under everyone's radar yesterday. (Not that I expect poetry sales to magically take off OH WAIT THAT IS SORT OF HAPPENING**.) Which leads me to my next point:

To succeed, you have to do your homework. This entails knowing the fundamentals as well as actively searching out information you don't think is widely disseminated or carefully scrutinized. To have a shot, you've got to have a good handle on the basics of this industry. To have a shot at outperforming everyone else, you've got to constantly keep an eye out and an ear to the ground. Find out what's selling, how the market is changing, what's historically worked (and what hasn't), &c, &c.

Remember, when it comes to book sales, you're competing for eyeballs and dollars. Why should someone pick up and purchase your book as opposed to someone else's? What knowledge or specialization do you have that might grant you an advantage? You can tell me you're authors and not businesspeople 'til, as my father says, the cows come home. That doesn't change the fact that by trying to make careers as writers you are, effectively, taking a shot at running a business. Do your research and do it well.

Both the stock market and the publishing industry react to new information. Neither system cares about old news. When doing your research, ensure that you're minimizing assumptions about what information hasn't yet been incorporated into the market. Chances are, you're not as ahead of the game as you might at first think. If you are ahead, however, you've got to be prepared to run with it.

Every event is an opportunity for someone. The stock of Company A is down? It's an opportunity for someone to buy at a discount. The stock of Company B is reaching new heights? It's an opportunity for someone to sell, make some cash, and reinvest it in another asset they find promising.

The same goes for publishing: the changes that have been rocking the industry for years are constantly producing opportunities. Borders went out of business; some independent stores are seeing growth as a result. The industry is transitioning over to a digital format for a substantial subset of its titles; some authors have found new audiences in the e-book format. And so on and so forth.

The point of all this is: as dissimilar as the worlds of the stock market and the publishing industry may at first seem, there are a lot of parallels. Publishing is a business. Research and a working understanding of the market are essential for success. Yes, your writing has to be good enough. Yes, you have to have a great story. But you also have to convince people to spend their hard-earned cash on that story.

Writing is half the battle; the other half is selling.***



*This isn't a real genre, but I really want it to be.

**This is more an example of the news cycle-related publishing hit, as mentioned in the previous example. But I just couldn't help myself.

***I lied about the other half being lasers. I'm sorry.

What I Learned on My Summer Vacation

· I should not have broken my vow to never again fly United Airlines. You know they break guitars, right?

· The Iliad is phenomenal, though not nearly as good as The Odyssey. Michael Chabon's The Yiddish Policemen's Union, which I've been meaning to read for a long time, is fantastic so far. I'm reading Jennifer Egan's A Visit from the Goon Squad next.

· New York City is smellier and hotter than I remember.

· Rayne Summers has figured out how to save the book industry!

· I don't really "tan." I mostly just turn red and then white again. I may have known this already.

· It is possible to play Plants vs. Zombies for an entire six-hour flight. If you haven't yet played it and are looking for a distraction, you can play a free online demo here. Make sure you finish your writing first!

Guest Post: Four Elements of a Great Book Signing

by Corrie Garrett

A couple Saturdays ago I spent the afternoon in downtown Los Angeles at a book signing for John Scalzi. He’s a NYT best-selling author for Old Man’s War and several other fantastic scifi novels, including his latest one, Fuzzy Nation. Basically, he’s an experienced guy who ran an excellent book signing. I’ve been to a few other book signing/reading events—and they are, sadly, not always a blazing success.

So, let’s say you’ve done your promotion and your marketing and you’ve managed to gather a respectable crowd at your local Barnes and Noble. What do you do with them?

1. Audience participation

Get involved. Scalzi was chatting with all the early arrivals when I got there, funny stories about his travel or whatever. When he started the "real" bit, he asked us a lot of questions. Did we hear about this from his blog? Did we want to hear him read from his new novel, or his next, unpublished one? He let the audience vote on it, and he then he had us all swear secrecy for the excerpt from his new book.

Take away: Talk to the audience before you start; this is the best way to assuage nerves if you’re uncomfortable. Ask questions. Maybe do a poll on favorite genre, how they know you, favorite character (particularly if you have an Edward/Jacob setting), or maybe how far they drove to come. The people coming to a book signing want to feel known even if it’s only a small way.

2. Elite status

Make the audience feel privileged. Signing books is only part of it. By coming to your book signing, they’ve formed a tenuous relationship with you, and inside information is a great way to cement the feeling of that relationship. Scalzi read from his novel that will be released in 2012.

You might not have another book contract, but you can still give inside information. If you might (possibly) be doing a sequel, give some clues about it. If you have nothing in the future (hopefully not!), give some insight into how this story came about. If the main character is based on your dog, or started as a ghost and turned into a vampire—talk about that.

3. Question control

A Q&A session is great for audience involvement, but you have to be on top of it. Scalzi told us up front that some questions he couldn’t answer (for legal reasons), and he didn’t hesitate to say, “Nope, that’s all I have to say about that,” on a couple questions that were off topic.

Some questions will be off the wall—only glancingly related to you or your book, or even inappropriate. A short answer is good, but don’t let them hijack the session with questions of no interest to anyone else. The rest of your audience will appreciate it.

4. Humor

Do funny. Okay, so a lot of us don’t have great comedic timing or fantastic impersonations or anything like that. But you don’t have to. Scalzi read the first few sentences from a prologue he spoofed on April Fool’s Day; the writing was hysterically awful and over the top.

Maybe you’re not into spoofs, but most of us authors have some pretty hysterical rough drafts and drawer manuscripts. Dig one out (an old one that doesn’t grieve you anymore), and find a section to give your audience. If you read from your current book, don’t be afraid to spice it up. Dramatic pauses, voices, gasps—whatever fits. They’re ready to be entertained, so be brave. Collect some anecdotes from your travel or tour and have them ready. Self-deprecating humor is always a safe bet, too.

Getting people to your book signing is fantastic, making them tell all their friends about it is even better. Have fun!

The Long and Short of It

Caveat: this post pertains more to those of you writing literary fiction than genre fiction, mes auteurs, but I do think there are aspects that writers of genre fiction may find enlightening.

So!

I'll be the first to tell you that short story collections don't sell well—it doesn't matter whether you've had short fiction in The New Yorker, it doesn't matter whether you earned your mfa at Iowa, it doesn't matter whether you're drinking buddies with the ghost of Flannery O'Connor—they uniformly don't sell very well. Often an agent will only take a short story collection from a promising new author on the condition that they also get his or her first novel.

However! The short story itself can be a way of grabbing an agent's attention, and getting yourself represented is half the battle. For example:

Publishing short stories lends you street cred. True, the agent is more interested in your writing than in your biography, but a biographical note that includes "Chester A. Author has recently published fiction in The Atlantic, The Paris Review, and The New Yorker" will almost certainly catch an agent's eye. That doesn't mean (s)he will immediately sign you, but (s)he might decide to send a request for a partial rather than a polite rejection.

Literary agents read literary journals. I know a few (and know of several more) agents who regularly read literary magazines in search of new talent. The more you publish, the higher your profile.

Literary agents recommend writing and writers to each other. Even if your dream agent hasn't read anything in which you've been published, (s)he still has plenty of friends, colleagues, and friends of colleagues who may have. Remember: a huge number of new authors are signed based on recommendations rather than via queries culled from the slush.

Publishing short stories entails writing short stories, and writing short stories entails a ton of practice. It goes without saying, but if you've written enough to publish several short stories in reputable magazines and journals, you've put a fair amount of time and effort into your writing. I've said it before and I'll say it again: patience and discipline are worth more in this business than talent and luck (though you'll need some of the former and a lot of the latter).

There you have it, amigos and -as. So now, prithee, inform me: which magazines/journals do you regularly read or subscribe to? Where do you find new authors? Which authors or stories have you read recently that you loved, were excited about, or recommended to others?

Guest Post: Book Trailers, Batman, and Short-Form Promotion

by Brendan Gannon

In March, author Rye Barcott posted about his experience producing a trailer for his book. He expresses a healthy skepticism regarding the value of the trailer. Great: it is indeed hard to judge the extent to which a trailer actually boosts sales. (For the record, by the end of the post he is optimistic about the value of trailers, as am I.) His skepticism, however, is due at least in part to his doubt that the trailer can convey the essence of his book: "Can a few minutes on a screen really do justice to such a rich experience? I don't think so."

Well, that got me to thinking. A trailer that doesn't effectively capture the spirit of the work would be a lousy trailer. Right? If the trailer for Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows showed Harry sitting in a tent for two minutes and forty seconds, we would not be impressed. Only two things separate a good trailer from a bad one:

• It conveys the essence of the work it represents.
• It's exciting enough to make the viewer want to learn more about, and ultimately pay for, the work it represents.

The general public would probably agree that some trailers make the grade. But we aren't the general public, we are authors! We labor for years on our personal masterpieces, weaving subtlety and meaning into a compelling narrative. How could a short flashy video possibly capture our books? This sentiment is similar to the complaint many would-be authors raise about query letters and synopses. Same idea, right? I created a sophisticated, many-layered narrative. How am I supposed to get that across in 250 words?

Why book trailers are awesome

The great strengths of a book trailer are the qualities that people doubt most. It's short. It's an audio/video representation of a printed work. It's for people with short attention spans. You wouldn't want it any other way.

These qualities mean your trailer can do things your book can't do, go places your book can't go. A trailer, like a haiku, captures big ideas through effective use of imagery and metaphor. A trailer conveys theme, mood, and motifs through use of color, light, and sound. A trailer vividly paints the world, the characters, and the stakes of your work. A picture, after all, is worth a thousand words, and you've got a minute or so of video.

Let's look at Batman as an example of effective short-form promotion. (Doesn't everyone?) When the movie The Dark Knight was about to come out, the studio knew they had a bundle of Hollywood hotness on their hands, and even before the trailers they had to get that across in the simplest of teasers: still images on posters, in print, and on the web. Hence the "Why so serious?" campaign.

This poster doesn't tell you much about the movie per se, but it does tell you what the movie is like. The blood suggests that Batman is a target, and that he is vulnerable. The lighting, the brick and the scrawls tell us the film will be gritty and hint at the Joker's low-tech methods. The tagline hints at the jarring contrast of the Joker's character: his drive to mock mainstream society and the disturbing, violent tactics he uses. It says if you like provocative, gritty and gothic you will like this movie. If you like campy comic book villains, you won't. Accurate and exciting. Done.

So how are you supposed to condense 60-80,000 words into a short video clip, or a one page query letter? By being authors. It's in the job description.

Yes, you can

Put another way: if you were an employee of the publisher, it would be unfair of them to expect you to write the book and market it. But you're not. You're a sole proprietor. You're ultimately responsible for your book, and everything about it; everyone involved in its journey to publication is effectively a contractor providing their services to you. The publisher is like a consultant. If they say make a trailer, you'd be wise to listen to them. That's how they earn their cut.

Another common sentiment is "it's not fair. I don't know anything about video/marketing/queries/etc." Sure it's fair. If you were expected to design a bridge or rebuild a carburetor as part of the publishing process, that would be unfair. You're a creative. If you can learn to write a book, you can learn to make a trailer, or at least learn to get a trailer made. The good news is no one expects you to change their lives in sixty seconds or 250 words. Refer to the above: convey the essence of your work. Be exciting. That's it!

Granted, plenty of book trailers we see out there are not very effective. Distilling a book's essence and capturing said essence in short form represents a challenge, and naturally some efforts fall short. Your job as a creative is not to fall short. Polish that query letter 'til it gleams and savagely trim that synopsis. Your job as a business person is to make sure your contractors don't fall short. If they're not capturing the essence of your work (in your trailer, in your website, in your promotional bookmarks) you're either not communicating effectively or you're working with the wrong person.

What say you, readers? Do I presume too much? Or should us writer-types apply our nose to the grindstone and broaden our horizons?

Brendan Gannon is a web developer and multimedia producer based in Boston. He writes YA/MG fiction and blogs at http://brendangannon.net. He thinks digital publishing and mobile apps are the bee's knees, but he's also very fond of paper.

Guest Post: Making A Commercial Novel More Upmarket Using Setting

by Stella Notecor

Upmarketing Your Novel!

Have you ever heard of an upmarket novel? Many commercial books with literary elements are now being called "upmarket novels." Nowadays, commercial fiction tends to be a bit... commercialized. Adding touches of literary elements to your novel can help your fiction transcend genre, resonate with readers, and become timeless. (All of which translates to bigger sales and more money in your pocket!) That doesn't mean your fiction needs to be that dry and boring stuff your high school teachers made you read. Upmarket fiction can be as entertaining as commercial fiction!

Often the literary elements that suffer the most in a commercial novel are the setting details. We don't want to bog down our readers by providing too many setting details that pull them away from the plot. The following three tips will help you give your commercial fiction more oomph without detracting from the plot.

Tip #1 - Make the description relate to the character.

Descriptions should come from your character's point-of-view. Consider an old woman observing the house her granddaughter is begging her to sell so she can move into a retirement home.

"I stared up at the house that had been my life. The porch swing swayed in the breeze coming off the lake, much more gently than it ever had when my two sons were the ones swinging it. Wildflowers filled the window boxes. I always picked a plant or two when we went away on family vacations, bringing them back much as we brought back memories. The steps sagged a little, testament to the many little feet that ran up and down them over the years, but all in all, the house looked just as it had when Henry and I bought it fifty-five years ago."

Now, consider her granddaughter's point of view.

"This house would be the death of Gram. The old porch swing shuddered at the slightest breeze, threatening to fall from its rusty chain the next time Gram took a seat. Wildflowers in window boxes required Gram to water them every day. Elise had watched her totter around the house once, carrying a heavy watering can, as she attempted to water all the flowers. She'd nearly tripped coming down those old, rickety steps and the uneven walk had practically begged her to fall and break a bone or two. She had no idea why Gram wanted to stay in this death-trap."

Descriptions become more powerful when we see them through our characters' eyes.

Tip #2 - Use bits of culture to give your story realism.

Using small cultural references can help your readers identify a character's age, race, personality, and socioeconomic background while adding only a few words to your word count. Consider the following descriptions.

"Jane grabbed a soda from the fridge, then headed out the front door. Sliding into the car, she turned on the ignition and grinned as her favorite song came blasting out of the radio."

"Madison grabbed a strawberry Fanta from the fridge, then headed out the front door. Sliding into her Scion, she turned on the ignition and grinned as her favorite Katy Perry song came blasting out of the radio."

"Stacy grabbed a Pepsi from the fridge, then headed out the front door. Sliding into her Cadillac, she turned on the ignition and grinned as her favorite song by The Monkees came blasting out of the radio."

Which descriptions were more engaging? Madison and Stacy's, right? And I'm sure you can guess which girl was born in the fifties and which girl was born in the nineties!

(A caution... pop culture snippets can also date your story. If used in a modern book, editors may ask you to remove or limit them so that you don't render the book unsellable after a certain length of time. A teenager who mentions "Bennifer" isn't going work as well now as it did when Ben and Jennifer were still dating!)

Tip #3 - Make your setting a character.

By this, I mean that your setting should influence the story as much as a character does. Reading about the barren desert is all well and good, but the desert can become truly interesting if you make it out to be a savage beast, tearing your character's life away from them.

"The sand crept into everything. It got into our shoes and wore away at our socks, filling them with holes. Then it attacked our feet, wearing away the skin and leaving behind raw wounds that ached with every step we took.

The sun beat down on us, burning our skin and evaporating what little water we collected. If it weren't for the sun's heat, we could have walked twenty miles a day. Instead, we barely managed five."

Now, isn't that description a lot more interesting than "The hot and sandy desert made traveling difficult"?

Obviously, making your setting more interesting can make your novel a lot more interesting too. And there are ways to do it without adding to your word count. So, I have a question for you. Do you think you will use literary elements in your stories now? Which ones? Why? Why not?

Stella Notecor believes that love knows no boundaries. She writes erotic fiction that reflects that, choosing to focus on her characters' stories, not their genders. Her first self-pubbed novella, The Broken, was released May 29th in formats for all major e-readers. Visit her website at http://tiny.cc/stellanotecor for more information and to read an excerpt.

Getting Your Name Out There

As I've mentioned a few times, gentle readers, an author's name is a brand, a social currency, a form of capital: it can signal cultural awareness ("Have you read the new book by so-and-so?"), serves as synecdoche for a book's actual content ("Have you read the new Suzanne Collins? Well, she wrote it, it must be good,"), and even acts as a seal of approval (e.g. reviews and blurbs).

So how do you get yours out there?

Well, the most obvious answer is to write a fantastic book that people love. Until then, however, there are a few things you can do to get your name and your writing on readers' radars.

Attend events. There's no substitute for face time, mes auteurs. Attending readings, book signings, panel discussions, conferences, conventions, and other literary events in your genre of interest will not only help you fill out your mental Who's Who, but will help raise your profile among other readers and writers interested in the sorts of books you are.

Write reviews. Just behind talking about themselves, people love reading about themselves. Write reviews of books you love by authors you admire, link to them, and spread a little good karma. The worst that'll happen is your name will be in print or on-line in one more place than it was previously; the best that'll happen is that the author will repost, retweet, link to, or otherwise call out your stellar review, and that can help raise awareness of your name significantly.

Participate in social media. You won't have the time or money to attend every in-person event you'd like, but that doesn't mean you're in any way cut off from the writing community of your choice. Social networking sites like Facebook and Twitter allow you to communicate with people you might never otherwise meet, and maintaining a web presence (website and/or blog) provides you a sort of digital storefront for you and your work. Networking has never been easier than with the biggest network (of networks) on the planet: the Internet.

Publish your short fiction. If you write short stories, submit 'em for publication. A nice array of publication credits in print and/or on-line will not only help build awareness of your brand, but may attract attention from agents and editors. Should you decide to go it alone and self-publish your work electronically, you can sell your short stories on the cheap to attract consumers for your novel. Again: worst case scenario, your name comes up more often in print, in conversation, and/or on-line.

Ideas? Theories? Tried-and-true methods? To the comments with you!

Nine Ways to Give a Better Reading

by Brad Phillips

We've all been to that book reading—the one where the book's author is so dull that you decide to return the book to the store shelf and buy something else instead.

I've been to many book readings through the years, and only a couple stand out as exceptional (Dave Eggers’ reading for A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius was a rare gem).

The good news is that it's not hard for authors to improve their readings. In this article, I’ll offer nine tips writers can implement immediately to inspire audience members to buy at least one copy at the store—and sell many more through word of mouth.

1. Test The Microphone and Logistics in Advance: This is an easy one, but too many authors approach the lectern for the first time when they're about to begin their reading. Inevitably, they have to adjust the microphone, figure out where to place their water, and arrange their papers. Avoid that lousy first impression by arriving early, taking in your surroundings, and testing the microphone before the first person arrives.

2. Don't Begin With Thank You: Book readings represent the culmination of a years-long writing and publishing process, and authors are understandably grateful to those who have helped them reach that moment. But authors who begin by thanking their publisher, editor, cover artist, publicity staff, and spouse risk putting their audiences to sleep.

Remember—a book reading is an opportunity to sell your book. If you begin your speech with a soporific or redundant opening, you're less likely to achieve your goal. Begin with something that grabs the audience's attention first—then go back, if necessary, and deliver your thank yous.

3. Don't Read The Book to The Audience: Your audience can read your book themselves. Little is more monotonous than hearing someone else reading words aloud. Great authors elevate the text by using a compelling vocal delivery to emphasize key phrases, increasing the tempo to build suspense, and modulating their volume to match the content. Listen to a bestselling book on tape to get a sense of how the pros do it.

4. Match the Talk to Your Strengths: Are you a great extemporaneous storyteller? Why kill that part of your personality by merely reading from your book? Instead, consider reading a small excerpt of the book, then telling an extemporaneous story (you can alternate between the two throughout your talk).

5. Err on the Side of Too Little: How long should your talk be? Just long enough to sell your book, and not a moment longer. That’s a hard balance to strike, but my bias is to be on the slightly too short side (perhaps that's because I'm 5'5". But I digress). It's better to leave your audience wanting more than to wear them down—so keep the reading to about half an hour (experienced speakers can go a bit longer), plus 15-20 minutes for questions. Stick around afterwards to answer remaining questions from audience members who approach you.

6. Set Up the Questions and Answers: Before you begin taking questions, tell the audience how long you plan to answer questions. Twenty minutes might feel like an eternity if they have no clue how long you're planning on going, but it's fine if they can anticipate when the ending point will arrive. Keep your answers short—five-minute answers tend to bog down the question and answer portion of the talk.

7. Prepare for the Obvious Questions: A surprising number of writers fumble through their answers to basic questions. Think through the answers to the most obvious questions in advance, such as:

"What does the title mean?"
"What did you learn when writing the book?"
"What was the biggest surprise along the way?"
"What did the subject(s) of the book think of it?"
"What are the subject(s) doing now?"
"Was the character inspired by a real person?"

8. Repeat Questions for the Audience: Since many book readings are recorded, this is important even in small groups when everybody can hear the question.

9. Don't Limp to the Finish Line: Great books have a great closing, and so do great book readings. Instead of ending your talk the moment you finish answering your last question, provide a quick wrap-up. Your official closing doesn't have to last long—30 – 60 seconds is fine—but even those few seconds allow you to leave the audience remembering exactly what you want them to.

If you're stumped, try adding a very short anecdote at the end. Choose one that is emblematic of your book's theme and that helps reinforce one of your book's main takeaway points.

(Check out the original post here.)

Brad Phillips is the author of the Mr. Media Training Blog, where a version of this story first appeared. His firm, Phillips Media Relations, specializes in media and presentation training.

Markets Are Our Specialty

As I've mentioned before, one of the many reasons the publishing industry is—well, unique, let's say—is because its product is more or less 100% returnable. If a publisher sends 10,000 copies of a book to Joe's Box o' Books and Joe can only sell off 7,000, 3,000 go back to the publisher to be remaindered or pulped.

As with all things, however, there are exceptions, and one of the major exceptions to the returns game in the publishing industry is in the realm of special markets.

Special markets are retailers that sell a fair number of—but do not specialize in—books (e.g. cooking stores, museum gift shops). Non-returnable (a.k.a. "firm") sales to these customers mean that no matter how poorly the title(s) in question do(es), that customer cannot send the books back to the publisher for credit. Just as with their other merchandise, they keep the product on the shelves until it sells or until they get rid of it at their own expense.

Because the risk is borne by the retailer and not the vendor, sales numbers for special markets are usually smaller and less flexible than they are for most book retailers. They depend to a much higher degree on price point and format, as certain retailers only do well with certain types of books, and most titles will only fit a very few niche special markets. All this to say: there is no universal "special markets book," meaning no title is immune to the spectre of returns.

As you can imagine, most titles sold in to special markets are nonfiction (arts & crafts, cooking, history, science, pop culture, and so on), so your novel is unlikely to be sold on a non-returnable basis in any significant way. However, various author events, shows, conferences, &c will require additional orders, and while these aren't "special markets" in the conventional sense, they very often entail non-returnable sales. There will be some capacities in which your books are safe from returns.

Speaking of returns, tomorrow: the return of... returns!

Let's Say I Wrote a Book

I've been reviewing your comments and e-mails regarding self-publishing, dear readers, and so far no one has reported making more than a couple hundred dollars. Which, granted, is money you didn't have before, so for those of you making money self-publishing: well done!

Do I think you could make more money publishing traditionally? That's a tricky question. If you're a good writer who's willing to self-promote: probably. If not: no, because no one will buy your work. Regardless, as most of you know by now: a get-rich-quick scheme, self-publishing ain't.

But! Please keep sending e-mails my way. I'm happy to post about anyone making a living via self-publication, so long as I can see the numbers.

Now then: let's say I wrote and published a book.

I'm not saying whether I did or didn't; I'm just saying: supposing I did. What would my process look like? My self-promotion? My "do"s and "don't"s? And in what order would I do (or not do) those things?

In brand-new for 2011 Top-Ten-O-Vision™:

1. I probably wouldn't self-publish. As I've mentioned before, self-publishing is fine for some endeavors, but generally not for those that aim toward fame, glory, and money. Insofar as those can be attained via writing books, that is.

2. I'd probably start with a smaller press. Not that I'm saying the Big Six would be knocking down my door for a publishing contract; rather, authors generally get more attention from smaller presses, and since the advance and co-op dollars available for a début author usually aren't phenomenal regardless of publisher, I don't see a real downside. I'm all about more one-on-one time and input on the details.

3. I'd be social networking my tiny black publishing heart out. I'd be tweeting. And announcing things on Facebook. And keeping a personal blog. And setting up an author website. And guest-blogging. And doing podcasts. And making sure an e-book version's available. And and and. You get the idea, cats & kittens. I wouldn't want a digital footprint, I'd want a digital impact crater.

4. I'd be real-world networking my tiny black publishing heart out. Everything from getting in face time with the owners and salespeople at my local independent book stores to doing in-store author events & readings. You get a lot of breadth but little depth with social networking, so I think it's important to complement one's electronic self-promotion with a little old-fashioned legwork. I'd be getting out there and meeting people before you could say honey, come quick, that misanthropic publishing guy is actually leaving his apartment.

5. I'd be soliciting reviews. Editors of literary magazines, fellow authors/writers, bloggers, independent booksellers, and various friends, family members, and accomplices who frequent Amazon are all fair game. I imagine the publisher would help out with this, as most have a lot of industry connections and could do a review copy mailing pretty easily. Reviews are worth their Microsoft Word file size in gold, mes auteurs. People can't read what they don't know about.

6. One word: conferences. This sort of ties into #4 above, but I figure it deserves special attention. Readings and book signings expose you to one audience; hanging out with indie booksellers, another; and electronic media like Facebook and Twitter render you vaguely recognizable to a yet another (arguably larger) one. But there's nothing like a conference to get everyone—booksellers, writers, readers, librarians, publishers, editors, professors, salespeople, you name it—all in the same room. I'd go to any relevant conference I could afford.

7. I'd review the work of others. Whether via book reviews in fancy literary magazines or blog posts, writing book reviews garners you 1.) general good karma, 2.) goodwill from those you review (assuming you do so positively), and 3.) street cred as a serious reader and writer of literature. In terms of positive and negative reviewing, I draw the line as follows: if I'm reviewing books in my capacity as an editor or reviewer for a magazine, I'll feel free to review negatively that which I believe warrants a negative review. If I'm doing it to widen my own exposure and that of the author/text at hand, better only to review titles I know I can say something good about.

8. I'd invest in the work of others. This is a generalization of #7 above, and it won't always earn you direct attention/acclaim, but it's a necessary aspect of participating in a literary community: you've got to give as well as take. Attend readings, subscribe to magazines and buy books you like, &c &c. The more you support others, the more others will want to support you. Or, at the very least, they'll feel guilty if they don't.

9. I'd take regular breaks. I can't run at 100% power 100% of the time, bros and she-bros, and neither can you. Regular days off and vacations are part of the working life, and writing—as we all know—is work.

10. I'd keep on keepin' on. With all this self-promoting, you'd think I wouldn't have time for anything else. But you'd be wrong! There's always another story, another book, waiting in the wings. Some of us are slower or faster than others, more or less prolific, but the key is: so long as you're always writing/working on your next project, you're much less likely to lose momentum and stall out in the midst of your career. I'd be selling one project while writing the next and planning the one after that.

That's it for today, meine Autoren. Questions? Ideas? Theories? Schematics? To the comments!

Sales Update: The Music Memoir

Looking to finally secure that six-figure advance with a Big Six publisher, mes auteurs? If so, look no further! All you need is the following:

• An international reputation as a major musician spanning at least three decades;
• A decently talented ghostwriter.

In short, music memoirs are in, primarily because (quoting the article's anonymous New York City publishing executive), "they're pretty easy to produce, and with an already built-in audience, fairly cost-effective." That is to say: publishers are convinced people will buy a memoir by a musician, so they pour more money into the marketing and sale of the book, thereby creating the literary equivalent of a self-fulfilling prophecy. Well, sort of. Not quite. Partially.

Publishers are right that people will buy musicians' memoirs, which (à mon avis) is because they (musicians, not publishers) seem to suffer disproportionately from drug addiction, problems with alcohol, mental illness, hilarious/absurd/numerous sexual escapades, &c &c, and we Americans love us some sex and death in our entertainment. True, the publishers' commitment to higher advances and (in some cases) production values guarantees that they'll work harder (read: spend even more money) to move copies of the book through the register, but at the risk of repeating myself: publishers cannot create a bestseller without the reading public's cooperation.

While some musicians (and celebrities in general) are qualified to write their own memoirs, most aren't (and even those who are usually don't): instead, ghostwriters are hired to write their book for them. I'm actually not quite sure how the advance and royalty structure works for ghostwriters, but I imagine they're contractually entitled to a cut of the book's profits. Any agents and/or ghostwriters in the house: please feel free to enlighten me/us in the comments!

Now, to come full circle: if you don't have the aforementioned multi-platinum international rockstar of mystery career and qualified ghostwriter, all is not lost! You just have to get permission to write the authorized biography of some such celebrity. Which, I guess, might be difficult if you don't already have some sort of "in" and/or a proven publication record in journalism, memoir, creative nonfiction, &c.

Yes, well, while you ponder the implications of becoming a world-famous musician and/or journalist who covers world-famous musicians, I'm going to go pre-order Keith Richards' Life. To the Internet!

Timing is Everything

There are a lot of factors affecting your success in this industry, writeurs and writeuses, including talent, luck, discipline, luck, motivation, and, of course, luck. Among these is another factor over which you have relatively little control (at least in terms of a publication date), but it can be of significant importance to your sales: timing.

I can guarantee you that at any launch meeting you attend, if someone's presenting a title due out in the spring that has even the slightest connection to environmentalism/green living/&c, the first words out of the sales rep's mouth will be: "Can we bump this to coincide with Earth Day?" Books about religious holidays (Christmas being the obvious example) come out in time for holiday shoppers; books about celebrities in the news are rushed out the door in order to capitalize on media attention; women's fiction and memoirs by female political figures come out in time for Mother's Day, and books about golf, grilling, and other assorted manly topics come out in time for Father's Day.

If you're writing literary fiction, science fiction, fantasy, or historical fiction, you might not have much in the way of "prime" timing. Be aware, however, that many more books are published in the fall than at any other time of year, so if you're pubbing in the fall, 1.) you'll have the advantage of full(er) book stores and holiday shopping madness, but 2.) so will everyone else, and you may get drowned out by the deluge of new titles.

I'm hesitant to say whether romance titles do better around Valentine's Day. My inclination is to believe that romance titles are bought year-round by very devoted audiences, so it doesn't seem likely that there'd be much of a bump for a Hallmark holiday in February. I don't think many husbands/boyfriends/partners buy many books for their wives/girlfriends/partners for Valentine's Day (which is sad!), and the only items I can think of that would see a bump are the tried-and-trues (chocolates, champagne, &c), movie tickets (hello romantic comedies!) and maybe DVDs.

If you're writing children's or YA, there's an interesting sales bump around Easter that doesn't appear in sales trends for adult titles, so you might benefit from a publication date in March or the first week of April.

Mysteries, in my experience, do well in the fall, but that could be due to the fact that everything does well in the fall (see above). I'm not sure whether Halloween exerts any influence, but I don't think it can hurt.

As previously mentioned, women's fiction tends to do well in the spring and summer, due in large part to Mother's Day and the perennial "beach read" tables in brick-and-mortar book stores. Then again, many argue that most fiction is "women's fiction," so take this with a grain of salt.

Finally, non-fiction (unless it's holiday-themed or otherwise sensitive to a particular time of year) tends to loosely follow the news cycle, so books about oil and BP did well during the Deepwater Horizon disaster, books about derivatives, mortgage-backed securities, and other financial topics did (and continue to do) well in the midst of the recession, and books about or by celebrities do well when those celebrities are in the news (everything from winning awards to getting jail time to biting the proverbial dust).

In short: absolutely ask your agent and editor about the timing of your book release, and don't be afraid to make suggestions if you think anything from Arbor Day to Yom Kippur will make an impact on your sales. Being in the right place (ideally front-of-store) is only half the battle; the other half is guns being there at the right time.

We Regret to Inform You: The Form Rejection (Rerun)

Another hectic week, meine Autoren, so here's another classic from the PMN vault. Enjoy! — E

Episode: "We Regret to Inform You: The Form Rejection"
Originally aired: Monday, November 2nd, 2009

For those of you in the know (and there are more of you than you might think), there have, over the past several months and years, been periodic imbroglios re: the use of the form rejection by literary agents. I don't usually foray into this territory, but I thought a patented PMN Analogy® might be of some use. It's actually not my analogy—I'm shamelessly appropriating it from a guy I was talking to last week—but I find it too good to pass up.

Remember when you applied to college? Fun, right? The standardized tests, the trips to the guidance office, the teacher recommendations, the thrill of victory, the agony of defeat, &c &c. The point being: remember when maybe you didn't get into that one college? Did they send you a personalized four-page essay on how you were super great, but they just didn't have room for you? Or did they send you a one-page "thanks, but no thanks, better luck elsewhere"?

Aha.

As I've said before, you, gentle (though as-yet-unrepresented) readers, are not any given agent's primary focus or responsibility. Their time and efforts go first and foremost to their clients, and only after they've negotiated contracts, calmed down their own hysterical authors, sat through endless rounds of auctions, and attended every known (and many an unknown) conference on the planet do they have time to sit and read your query. This is why said query has to be good, and this is why you can't be upset with a form rejection. Not only does an agent not have time to respond to every individual person who queries him or her, but to be completely honest, he or she wouldn't owe you a personal rejection even if he or she did have the time. Disheartening, perhaps, but true.

Caveat: this doesn't mean I wholeheartedly endorse the form rejection for, say, partials or fulls, and I've never been a fan of the idea that no news is bad news (i.e. no response means rejection). And I do realize that most (if not all) writers view their work as reflections or extensions of themselves, and often (perhaps subconsciously) equate rejection of their work with rejection of their overall abilities as writers, or even with rejection of themselves, period. But this is not the case, bros and she-bros. It's simply a rejection of your novel, not an indictment of your character.

I don't mean to sound harsh here. I write, you write, we all write, and we all get rejected. None of us likes being rejected, and I'm sure agents don't relish the opportunity to reject us. But it's a necessary evil of the system, cats and kittens, and if you want to graduate from the Publishing School of Hard Knocks, you've got to be able to take a form rejection or two. Or ten. Or two thousand.

All I can say is: soldier on, dear readers. Never give up! Never surrender!

Guest Post: Talking Books: Promoting Your Work on Radio

With all of the focus on online marketing and social media, it’s easy for an author with a new book out to overlook the traditional media—especially radio.

I’m not talking about the kind of radio station that plays music all day long. I’m talking about talk shows and current affairs programs. Because the kind of person who listens to intelligent radio programming is also the kind of person who reads. Radio listeners are the types of people who might just buy your book.

So how do you get on a radio program?

First, you need to research what programs there are that are relevant to your book. Is your book a novel, and more suitable to an arts show? Or is it non-fiction, and so might fill well within a show oriented towards science or health or current affairs? In addition to the major radio shows that get national airplay, many regional shows are likely to feature local authors—both regional shows that are affiliated with a major national network, and smaller, independently owned local radio stations.

There are actually numerous radio programs that focus specifically on the arts or on books—here is a list of some of the big national ones:

CBC (Canada)
Writers and Company (weekly)
The Next Chapter (weekly)
Q (daily arts and culture show)

NPR (USA)
“Fresh Air from WHYY” (daily arts show)

(also CBC’s daily arts show “Q” on PRI as of June 2010)

ABC (Australia)
The Book Show (daily)

BBC (UK)
Open Book (daily)

Obviously, the bigger the show is, the harder it is to get on. So, if you and your work are not so well known yet, you might want to focus on the smaller regional shows for now. But you also might want to aim high and try for the big ones, too. As long as your pitch is professional, it can’t hurt to get your name out there, can it?

So how do you do that?

1. Research the show that you want to get on. Make sure your book is relevant to what that show is about—otherwise you are wasting your time.

2. Find the name of that show’s producer. Send your book and a professional press release addressed to him or her several weeks before the date that you hope to be interviewed. Make sure your phone number(s) are on the press release (you’ll see why below).

3. Find a “time hook.” The media always want stories that appear to be “timely.” The lead-time to producing a book is so long that you’d have to be pretty darn lucky to have some news event happen to coincide with your book release. So make your “time hook” yourself, by organizing an event. The producer is much more likely to say yes to your pitch if they can wrap up the interview saying “And Jacqueline will be appearing tonight, reading from her new book at the Joe Blow Café…” Suddenly, the “story” is “timely” and they are more likely to want it. (This works for newspaper interviews too).

4. Think of the medium. Radio is about sound. It’s only partly about the words you wrote in your book (if they ask you to do a reading at all—oftentimes they won’t). And it’s not about how you look. It’s about the sound of your voice, how you put words together. Do you sound confident and interesting and fun? That’s good for radio. Do you sound bored, or do you mumble or stumble over your words? Hmm… that’s not so good for radio. So how do they know this about you? Well, if the pitch you’ve sent them interests them, they are very likely to get back to you by phone—the reason for that is because they are checking you out. They want to see how you sound. And how that phone call goes may be the clincher for them—do you sound good, or not?

5. Feel free to follow up with the producer, a week or so after they have received your package. A gentle “I just want to make sure you received..” email or phone call is fine. But don’t hound them.

OK, so let’s say you’ve got the interview. It’s easy to freak yourself out and get nervous. And that’ll make you stumble and sound bad. So don’t do that.

The radio people will be there in studio to make you feel at ease. They will explain to you how to sit, how far to be from the mic. I find it helps to drink a big glass of water right before I go on, so my throat is nice and clear. Find a comfortable position, so you can maintain a constant distance from the mic (usually leaning forward on the table is best) and so you are not rustling papers or clothing that will make distracting background sounds.

And most of all, don’t think of it as a public speech. Treat it like a private conversation with the host. This will keep you from feeling nervous, and it will also ensure that you come across sounding fluent and natural.

Jacqueline Windh is author or major contributor to four books, including the Canadian best-seller The Wild Edge. She is also a photographer and a freelance radio broadcaster whose documentaries have played on CBC and ABC. You can find her at www.jacquelinewindh.com.

The Ten Commandments of Blogging (Rerun)

Work abounds, mes auteurs, so another blast from the past (this one from last September). Enjoy! — E

Episode: "The Ten Commandments of Blogging"
Originally aired: Thursday, September 3rd, 2009

1. I am thy blog. If you're an author, you should already have a blog. If you're not yet published, now is the time to start.

2. Thou shalt have no other blogs before me. We all love reading blogs—we wouldn't be here if we didn't—but yours comes first. Write your own posts before you spend all afternoon reading someone else's.

3. Thou shalt not make of thyself an idol. Keep your ego in check; you always want to portray yourself positively in your blog. Your reputation is all you've got in this business, and if you earn yourself one as a likable person as well as a great writer, you're a golden calf.

4. Remember thy Schedule and keep it, wholly. You don't have to write a post every day, but keeping a regular schedule is a courtesy and a sort of unwritten contract between you and your readers; they'll know when to expect new content and will come to appreciate and respect you for that.

5. Thou shalt honor thy agent and thy publisher. You couldn't have done this without them. Give props where props are due.

6. Thou shalt not commit character assassination. Everyone has authors or critics they don't like, sometimes personally. Don't pull an Alice Hoffman. And, I guess, don't try to kill anyone in real life, either.

7. Thou shalt not commit adultery, but thou shalt pimp thyself. No one sells you like you do. Facebook, Twitter, &c. The more pervasive your presence, the more likely it is that people will buy your book.

8. Thou shalt not plagiarize. Always quote. Always cite your sources. Always link back to them if they're on-line.

9. Thou shalt not deceive thy audience. Never post anything you don't believe is true, and be sure to provide links to any research you've done. Always be sure to clarify whether a point you're making is an opinion or a fact.

10. Thou shalt monetize. I don't do it because I don't consider blogging a part of my livelihood, but you, as authors, should consider self-promotion as part of the job. Let Google or whomever run a few relevant ads on your blog and make a little cash on the side. (Unless you've got a large readership, though, it probably won't be much.)

Why You (Still) Want an Agent

The times, they are a-changin', mes auteurs. The digital age means more books are available in more ways than ever before, which in turn means two things: first, you have that much more competition for eyeballs, and second, you need some way to differentiate yourself from the crowd such that all those eyeballs are reading your book.

In short: regardless of whether you're going (exclusively) digital, you want an agent.

Even if you fancy yourself a complete one-(wo)man show, an agent's multiple talents, myriad connections, and considerable experience will all be great assets to you in your quest for publication. This is true for more than a few reasons. In tried-and-true Bullet-o-Vision™ (I really should make a blog label for this):

· If you're dealing with an editor, an agent is worth his or her weight in gold in terms of contract negotiation (not to mention that going with an agent in the first place generally makes it much easier to get an editor's attention). This is doubly true as the details of e-rights are being hammered out.

· An agent will secure you a publishing house by way of said editor, meaning he or she is basically getting you editorial input, a marketing team, a publicist, a sales team, and an art department capable of making you a Truly Fancy Cover. Unless you're the aforementioned Jack/Jane of all trades, this is a huge bonus for you. (You also won't have to worry about getting your e-book fed out to Amazon, Apple, and the like.)

· You've got a buffer between you and your editor/publisher. This means that you can spend your valuable time writing while your agent spends his or her time talking to the editor/publisher (pitching your next project, hounding them for royalty statements, finding out why the awesome cover they helped you negotiate isn't showing up on Barnes & Noble's website, &c).

· You have a Fancy Website with lots of loyal visitors. Your agent has a Fancy Website with lots of loyal visitors. If you both add links to your book to your websites/blogs, you get that many more eyeballs reading about (and hopefully soon reading) your book. Agents go to bat for their clients in more ways than one.

· Finally, you get a measure of that e'er elusive brand recognition that separates your book from Joe "DIY" Lunchbucket. If you self-publish on-line, the only one vouching for your work is you. If you have an agent and an editor, you've got at least two organizations behind you vouching for your talent and credibility as a writer.

You Ain't In It For the Money

From this week's New Yorker:

[Rod Blagojevich's] wife, Patti, ate a tarantula in a contest with the actor Lou Diamond Phillips in Costa Rica for the reality show "I'm a Celebrity... Get Me Out of Here!" The couple explained that they needed the money.

May you never need money so badly.

All joking aside, mes auteurs, it's important for you to realize that you're not likely to make a ton of money with your writing. It is, in fact, unlikely that you'll even be able to quit your day job; only a vanishingly small percentage of working authors earn enough from their writing alone to support themselves. While it's nice to dream of a six-figure advance and a house in the Hamptons, sadly, that's probably all it'll ever be: a dream.

If you're a serious writer, you're not in it for the money. You're in it because you love writing, because you believe you're good at it, and because you believe your story deserves to be told and read. Sure, it's nice to be paid for something you love and are good at, but you'll probably have to do at least one other thing (something you may not love, or possibly even be good at) to make ends meet.

No one ever said it was easy being a writer. Paying work isn't guaranteed; you may end up being paid for writing you don't particularly want to do; you probably won't get paid a lot to do it. Them's the breaks.

However!

If you're at least comfortable with said day job, you can view your writing not only as a hobby, but as a potential (though relatively small) source of income. Extra money for something you love doing is a pretty nice bonus, even if it's only a few thousand dollars. Sure, it's hard work to finish a manuscript, send out a million queries, secure an agent, get a deal at a house, and help shepherd your book through the publication process, but if you truly love writing and publishing novels, you'll see it through. If not, you're not cut out for this business and should probably hang up your pen/keyboard.

The point, meine Autoren, is this: do this because you won't be happy doing anything else, not because you want to be the next James Patterson or J.K. Rowling (as nice as that'd be).

Guest Post: The Literature on Literature

Full public disclaimer: I am a lightweight in the world of scientific reading. Science can be fun, though—the Periodic Table and the Krebs Cycle notwithstanding. And I especially like science when it reinforces what I want to believe anyway (see disclaimer above).

For example—I have a co-worker who posts all the scientific studies showing the health benefits of coffee, just above the coffee maker at work. While I stand there waiting for my cuppa to brew, I read about how I am keeping Parkinson's disease at bay (here, from JAMA), reducing my chances of developing diabetes (here from The Lancet), and generally waking up (you don't need a medical reference on this).

So as a lifelong fiction lover, it is not surprising that I am also interested in the neuroscience that continues to grow around reading—why it feels good and why it’s good for you. Below are the highlights, based on my science-lite review of the literature.

Reading literature makes you smarter.

Here's one thing those wild and crazy scientists did: They took a group of unsuspecting people and had them read Kafka’s “The Country Doctor”—“a disturbing and surreal tale in which a doctor travels by 'unearthly horses' to an ill patient, only to climb into bed naked with him and then escape through the window ‘naked, exposed to the frost of this most unhappy of ages.'" They took another similarly innocent group and gave them “The Country Doctor” rewritten in a way such that the plot made more sense. THEN they made both groups take a test to assess their pattern recognition. Guess who did better?

“People who read the nonsensical story checked off more letter strings—clearly they were motivated to find structure," said Travis Proulx, a postdoctoral researcher at UCSB and co-author of the research. "But what's more important is that they were actually more accurate than those who read the more normal version of the story. They really did learn the pattern better than the other participants did.

Proulx said that the thinking behind the research was that when we are exposed to something which "fundamentally does not make sense," our brains will respond by "looking for some other kind of structure" within our environment."

Reading literature makes you more socially savvy.

Okay, next experiment. Readers were randomly assigned either a fiction story OR a non-fiction article from The New Yorker. Both groups were then given an analytical reasoning task in a multiple choice format (derived from a law school entrance exam) and a social reasoning test in the same format, with questions focused on the emotions, beliefs and intentions of characters in social scenarios. The result: The two sets of readers did just as well on the general reasoning questions, but the short-story readers showed a stronger understanding of social situations than the essay readers.

Why? Here’s the opinion of Keith Oatley, a professor at the University of Toronto who has done a lot of work in this field:

“My colleagues and I think it’s a matter of expertise. Fiction is principally about the difficulties of selves navigating the social world. Non-fiction is about, well, whatever it is about: selfish genes, or how to make Mediterranean food, or whether climate changes will harm our planet. So with fiction we tend to become more expert at empathizing and socializing.”

Reading gets your kids into college.

I’m not dumping on Stanley Kaplan or Saturday lessons with Dmitri, the Russian math genius, but independent reading seems to be the best way to boost those SAT scores. Here's what the American Library Association says (not that they have a dog in this fight or anything): “The amount of free reading done outside of school has consistently been found to relate to growth in vocabulary, reading comprehension, verbal fluency, and general information. Students who read independently become better readers, score higher on achievement tests in all subject areas, and have greater content knowledge than those who do not.”

Reading Relaxes.

Maybe you think you need a masseuse and a steam room, or a martini and a sunset, but it turns out that the key to relaxation is RIGHT THERE ON YOUR BEDSTAND! Yet another group of cash-hungry underemployed individuals was recruited. These unfortunate people were deliberately stressed—forced to fill out 1040s in iambic pentameter or had their iPhones extracted and buried in an undisclosed location or... something. (If you're a mouse, they drop you in a pail of water and make you swim, because it turns out mice hate to swim.) THEN, having thoroughly stressed everyone out, the researchers randomized the subjects to some form of relatively relaxing activity. Like sipping a cup of tea. Or going for a walk. Or listening to music. Or reading a book.

And which activity worked the best and fastest according to those super-smart cognitive neuropsychologists? Reading.

It works better and faster than other methods to calm frazzled nerves such as listening to music, going for a walk or settling down with a cup of tea...

Psychologists believe this is because the human mind has to concentrate on reading and the distraction of being taken into a literary world eases the tensions in muscles and the heart.

Their stress levels and heart rate were increased through a range of tests and exercises before they were then tested with a variety of traditional methods of relaxation.

Reading worked best, reducing stress levels by 68 per cent, said cognitive neuropsychologist Dr David Lewis.

Subjects only needed to read, silently, for six minutes to slow down the heart rate and ease tension in the muscles, he found. In fact it got subjects to stress levels lower than before they started.

Listening to music reduced the levels by 61 per cent, having a cup of tea or coffee lowered them by 54 per cent and taking a walk by 42 per cent.

Playing video games brought them down by 21 per cent from their highest level but still left the volunteers with heart rates above their starting point.

Dr Lewis, who conducted the test, said: "Losing yourself in a book is the ultimate relaxation."

So, grab yourself a book. And a cup of coffee. And some chocolate. (Did we talk about the chocolate literature yet?)


Kathy Crowley's short stories have appeared in a handful of (VERY discriminating) literary magazines and even an anthology or two. She practices medicine on the side and has just completed her first novel. She is a member of the writing blog Beyond the Margins (BeyondtheMargins.com).

The Internet Counts

Imagine you're a painter.

Further imagine that everything you've ever drawn or painted—even bar napkin sketches, canvases you've painted over, torn-up first drafts and designs—you keep in the same room in your house. You keep the good stuff there, too, but it goes without saying that the incomplete works far outnumber the completed ones.

Now imagine that, somewhere in the mid-90s, everyone on Earth could instantly go into that room whenever they wanted and browse through all your material, finished and un-.

That's how the Internet works; everthing you've ever committed to its more-or-less infinite memory is still there. Blog posts you've taken down are probably cached somewhere, as are defunct websites, message board threads, self-published short stories/novels, and the like. Writers need to be mindful of what they post on the Internet—not only because that material, no matter how rough or polished it may be, reflects on their abilities as writers, but because as we move further into the Age of the E-Book, more and more publishers and literary magazines are considering work that appears on-line "published," and therefore either ineligible for submission or subject to copyright restriction.

The good news is that, unlike in decades past, it's relatively easy to reach an extraordinarily large audience. As long as you're careful about what you post, send via e-mail, comment on, &c, you can pretty much go nuts with building a (hopefully successful) media platform for yourself in the comfort of your own living room. Blog it up, post small excerpts (if you have an agent, be sure to consult him or her), self-publish if that's your thing (though we all know how I feel about it), and tweet to your hearts' content. Just know that everything you say is, effectively, on the record.

Tomorrow: guest post contest results!

Prithee, Inform Me: Again!

Reminder: the deadline for guest post submissions is 11:59 pm tonight!

It's that time of year, cats & kittens. Tell me what you'd like to learn more about: the nitty-gritty of co-op, the lead title phenomenon, covers, market share, &c. Anything and everything is fair game.

To the comments!